Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Career or Family.

I got this from N@W and it's worth reading and contemplating for.

Career or Family
by: JB Jimenez - Ayala Land

Ano kayang halaga ng tagumpay sa career if it has been achieved at the expense
of the family. What profit does a man have kung mawawala naman ang kanyang
pamilya? OO nga, meron siyang salapi na milyon ang halaga, magandang mansyon,
travels around the world, and cavorts with an array of girls, women, and ladies,
pero naman ang kapalit kung ikaw naman ay being hated by your daughters and is
the mortal enemy of your sons. Can success in career really make up for failure
at home? Which then is more important, wealth or family. A great number of us
would readily say family. Pero totoo kaya na ang ating sinasabi ay ating
ginagawa. But do we walk our talk ika nga? Are we willing to translate our
mindsets into concrete actions? Day by day, we are bombarded by 52 million
dollar questions, Sino ba ang mahalaga ang mga anak ko o ang trabaho ko.

To my fellow employees, I don't know how you react out there or would Answer my
questions. In my case, as an accountant who always spend overtime in the office
to be able to submit deadline reports come month-end or cut-off period, I have
made unforgivable mistakes. If I have to live my life again, I would need to
overhaul my priorities, to rechannel the efforts that I Have been exerting with
passions and commitment . I thought all along na ang Lahat ng ginagawa kong
pagpapahirap at pagtratrabaho to the max to get a promotion, I am doing it all
for the family. But I was wrong . Today I know better. When my wife or daughter
is on the phone I make sure that I attend to them first, never mind if there are
urgent things to attend or papers to submit to my superior, after all they can
wait for 10! minutes..... but if I deny the 10 minutes that is so important to
them, it would have a lasting effect than to my Boss who might be replaced in a
couple of years.

My family is my top priority , period. It is not a choice between my family and
my career. MY FAMILY IS THE REASON WHY I NEED A CAREER. My career will come and
go, employers can come and go but one's family Will remain even beyond the grave
. They even take care of our graves. Noon kahit mayroon affairs sa school ang
aking mga anak, I'd tend to preponderate toward the official duty and delegate
the affairs of my kids to my wife. I used to operate on the paradigm that I
should focus on the duty first before pleasure . Now I know that MY first duty
is toward my loved ones. I should put my time where my heart belongs.

Today if I will to do it all over again, I'd reverse my priorities . My son will
only graduate once in elementary and only once in high school, I will make sure
I will be there, I will file my vacation leave and if my Boss rejected it
because I need to attend to a company function where I am required to attend, I
would still go to my kids graduation no matter what the consequences are. This
time I am willing to become an average corporate officer, a so-so business
executive but a great father. I'm willing to be reprimanded by my Boss for a
late report but not hated by a daughter for not remembering her birthday every
year.....na ilalabas ko siya the whole day and cherish the moments every minute
dahil alam ko hindi ko na maibabalik ito kapag lumaki na siya at kung gawin ko
man later, baka huli na. There are more important matters compared to corporate
business meetings, Family peace and love- these are the ones that matter most.

BUT I SPEAK ONLY FOR MYSELF. I DO NOT IMPOSE VALUES ON YOU GUYS OUT THERE.

If you think possessions are more important than family, go ahead. Spend 20
hours in the office, bring home your corporate work. Neglect your wife.. don't
spend quality time with your kids. Don't attend important family gatherings.
Find work that you are away for a week and only meet your family every
week-ends, oh what a waste. Delegate raising the children to your spouse. Leave
the young kids to the nanny. Let the driver brings your kids to school. Ask
someone to represent in your son college graduation. If you find something wrong
at home, don't mind it, anyway your concentration is in your job. You have your
career remember? Don't greet your father and mother on their anniversary. Spend
all your time in the company. Baka mawala ang tiwala ng Boss mo sa iyo sayang
ang pinagpaguran mo ng matagal. If you have aging parents, don't visit them.
enjoy your career in isolation. Drink, dance, be merry, But in the end, you lose
all the love ones who love you more, after
neglecting! them. No wife, no kids, no family. you are alone and pretending to
be happy. don't blame your company. don't lay the Burden on your Boss. Hindi ba,
You made the choice? You opted to put more value on your career. Dahil sabi mo
pinaghirapan mo lahat ito and pangarap mo na ito simula pagkabata dahil mahirap
ka lang ikamu...gusto mong yumaman. You gambled and you lost.

I know of an executive na masyadong depressed... every week lang siyang umuwi sa
pamilya niya. Week-ends lang niya nalalaro ang mga bata kung minsan required pa
mag-stay ng sabado sa office, who finds no meaning in his life, he's got the
money, a beautiful wife who according to him might be hiding something from him
(you know what I mean) and the kids are not genuinely closed to him, for no
apparent reason he had pulled the trigger to his head. He's got everything and
he lost everything. that is the tragedy of it all.

As for me, I know better. After all the pains, the burdens of mistaken
priorities, I have made my choice. Anytime, anywhere, my family comes first. My
career, my business, my outside clients, all my other pursuits are only means to
the end of all my sacrifices, my wife, my sons, my daughters, my family. I shall
thus manage my various objectives well. there shall not be conflicting objective
anymore. For I now know clearly my prioroties and shall be faithful to them. I
shall be willing to give them up; excess money, much comfort, travels, and girls
for and in the name of the family. That is simple and straightforward.

PS. Are you aware that if we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for
could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family we left behind will
feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour
ourselves more into work than to our own family, an unwise investment indeed,
don't you think? And we often treat strangers and coworkers better than members
of our family.

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